Is Santa a Stoner? A Theoretical Breakdown



Does Santa go for ganja? Let us be honest, there is a great deal of evidence to back again up both sides. When we solution the query of ‘is Santa a stoner’, we ought to initial look at different features of Santa existence and tradition, and then make an educated and educated conclusion as to his possible using tobacco practices. So let’s have at it guys, does Santa get down with the wacky weed, or is he way also experienced for that stuff?

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Santa Clause

We all know him. We all enjoy him. He might be a component of Christmas custom, but the large jolly facial area of Santa Clause can be appreciated by most any individual. Just after all, who does not like a joyful male with a significant sack of offers? I mean, yeah, probably we’re taught he isn’t so providing to the naughty among us, but is not naughty subjective to start out with??

The normal Santa of the modern world seems to be like an overweight dude in his 70’s or so, with vivid white hair, a significant ole beard, black boots, and white cuffs on what appears like a pink velvet go well with. He’s surely rockin’ his own fashion.

According to modern day tradition, Santa visits everyone’s home, bringing presents to people who are excellent, and leaving lumps of coal for these who are not. He evidently retains a listing of naughty little ones vs great little ones, just to make certain he will get it proper. He comes in by the chimney carrying a large bag of items, and leaves them beneath a Xmas tree, right before snatching up whatever sweets are still left for him, and continuing on his way. He rides a sleigh that flies in the air, and is pulled together by nine reindeer, who apparently have the power to fly as effectively. When not present-offering, he resides with his wife, Mrs. Clause, in the North Pole.

Saint Nick

It all seems type of psychedelic, doesn’t it? Well, in some pre-Christian shamanic traditions of Northern Europe, use of ‘fly agaric’ (amanita muscaria) mushrooms was linked with Christmas time. This powerful hallucinogenic was normally connected with magic and fairies, and seems as a red and white fungus that grows below fir trees and evergreens. Harvesting and applying these mushrooms is relevant to Santa Clause, and its quite probably why the shade scheme exists for Santa currently.

The a lot more modern-day Clause

In terms of how we see Santa nowadays, the contemporary picture goes back to a few unique tales, a person of which originated in 16th century England when Henry VIII dominated. At that time there was a Father Xmas tradition, and the Father Christmas character wore inexperienced or purple robes, and exemplified the strategy of the spirit of Christmas, representing good foods, wine, revelry, and pleasure.

Although it was held on December 6th for Feast Working day, when England dropped this tradition, Father Christmas celebrations had been moved to December 25th, with this currently being 1 of the traditions that led to Santa right now.

A different came from Dutch folklore, and is based mostly around a character termed Sinterklaas, which was based mostly off Saint Nicholas. The holiday celebrates St Nick on the 6th of December, which is usually when presents are supplied, fairly than the 25th. Sinterklaas is elderly and critical, with a extensive white beard and white hair. He wears a pink cape over a white bishop’s go well with, with red mitre and ruby ring. He rides a white horse and carries close to a massive book in which its recorded if youngsters are fantastic or bad. Of course there are similarities to today’s checklist-maintaining Santa.

A previous Santa point out goes to Woton, and Germanic traditions that pre-date Christianity. In advance of it became Xmas, the time period was named Xmas, and celebrated the mid-winter season solstice. This idea is that Santa arrived from the story of the Wild Hunt, which in accordance to pagan tradition, took area through the 12 raw nights ahead of Christmas. According to the tale, Odin – listed here identified as Woton, galloped across the sky with military in tow, to fight the battle of mild vs dark. This was a time of ghostly appearances and supernatural figures, which includes the Wild Hunt, in which Woton was stated to sometimes pluck unsuspecting victims correct off the ground.

Woton experienced a very long white beard, and rode a grey horse that experienced eight ft – a achievable lead-in to several reindeer. He wore a cloak and blue hood. Woton was warded off by the use of 9 herbs, with just one of them probably being marijuana. And today’s Santa Clause might extremely well be an edited model of this Germanic legend.

So, is Santa a stoner?

stoner santa

The concept of Santa may well incredibly effectively be hooked up to cannabis by the use of herbs to ward off Woton and the Wild Hunt. And he’s also involved with psychedelics as a result of the use of fly agaric mushrooms. But what about Santa now? Is the present-giving male we know and love a stoner like everyone else? Let’s examine!

Likely a stoner

  • There are a couple points that make Santa Clause probable a stoner. 1st and foremost is that age-old tradition of leaving out milk and cookies for the previous gentleman. Let’s be sincere, he’s meant to take a look at each individual single house. That is a substantial amount of money of milk and cookies. Who other than a stoner would involve a snack split at virtually each individual location, and the ability to retain pounding a lot more food items in? Variety of seems like in order to retain that monster appetite alive, Santa would have to be using tobacco substantial quantities of wacky weed.
  • He’s constantly flying, and I mean that virtually and figuratively. In the literal sense, he’s usually heading up in the air. Could this be to stay clear of smoking cigarettes guidelines in illegalized destinations? Is it to get some privateness for a quick spliff concerning homes? Santa seems to like being in the sky, and that could necessarily mean one thing. On the other figurative side, the person is usually joyful. Like, perhaps way too pleased. Or at minimum, really significantly delighted. The kind of content where its difficult to visualize that some thing isn’t being made use of to market that contentment outside the house of conventional means…
  • And then there is the plan that the man can not seem to be to locate front doors, opting for chimneys rather. Who other than a entire stoner is heading to enter your house through your chimney? Burglars do not even do that. You have to be so drunk, higher, or off your rocker to vacation resort to chimneys as a way to enter a household, that it states a little something for what Santa is on that this is his only method of entrance into each individual household he goes to.

Likely not a stoner

Getting explained all this, there’s continue to a superior chance that Santa’s jolliness will come from somewhere else, and the person is far more straight-laced than considered. Listed here are a number of backing points to Santa not currently being a stoner.

  • He does a large amount of operate for tiny kids. No matter of whether you’re pro-cannabis or anti-hashish, you are frequently not heading to blow smoke in a kid’s deal with. And though Santa’s jaunts upwards could be an sign of some non-public toking, it could nicely be that Santa respects his location amid the youthful generations, and refrains from illegal behavior, or actions that could established a terrible illustration for youngsters.
  • He’s obese! Though that virtually appears to be a lot more like a professional-weed argument, it’s truly not. Analysis has regularly demonstrated that frequent cannabis users usually have reduced BMIs, are significantly less possible to be overweight, and demonstrate overall much better metabolic wellbeing. Even more so than individuals who might consume considerably less energy, but never smoke hashish. While no complete explanation exists for this, scientists have recommended that its related to immediate and very long-lasting downregulation of CB1R which prospects to lessened electricity storage and improved metabolic charges. If Santa is overweight, it may possibly be much more about an overactive endocannabinoid method, and this would make him less very likely to be a stoner.
Santa stoner
  • He’s obtained a enormous sum of operate to do. I know that when I get stoned, I’m not up for going all around the neighborhood, permit by itself all above the earth. If Santa’s a pothead, maybe he’s a productive smoker who can get large and even now satisfy all his obligations, and probably he’s the kind of stoner who waits till the stop of the evening to smoke up with the spouse at property. But, maybe he abstains from hashish fully, opting as a substitute for a pleasant glass of merlot by the hearth, or a handful of rigid shots of whiskey to warm the blood in icy surroundings. If Santa is a stoner, he’s about the most productive stoner out there, though in all fairness, he only is effective 1 day a year!!


The beauty of Santa is that he can be whoever and whatever you want, and there is absolutely nothing lousy hooked up to him. Non-Christians are not ordinarily Santa haters, and people outside the house the faith normally like the standard notion of Santa, even if he’s not considered in or celebrated.

As to the problem of no matter whether Santa is a stoner, nicely, I consider so. I imply, if there actually was a Santa, I imagine the man would be lights up in all of his concerning-dwelling breaks, making up the appetite for all that milk and cookies. Besides, he’s bought a spouse back dwelling who in all probability busts his balls a large amount. Permit the dude have his night out and get a tiny baked. At the very least he’s not actually ample of a nut-occupation to smoke in entrance of your children!

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